disillusioningillusion

5 May 2019 This is the nature of me, I have written another post halfway, and got the urge to write about something else. So here I am. Here is a short. I hope it doesn’t become a long. God receives your prayers. Or does she? What is the purpose of religion? Religions are based upon the concept of a god or a deity. Hence those beings are what I assume prayers are directed to. Certain religions have set specific timings during which prayers are supposed to be done. A set number of times a day, a specific place, facing a certain direction. What of you don’t follow those rules? The books say that the gods will not receive your prayer and you have to abide the rules for some few consecutive days to reset your “sin-meter”. Some religions require you light an incense. Barring that, will god not hear your prayer? Then again, no where in the history of this religion stipulates the use of incense. Why then is it used? These customs are just made up, and in the case of young Singapore,...

3 May 2019 I am in the middle of Act III. I underestimated the amount of sexual innuendos Shakespeare is capable of making. I have learnt that “wherefore” means “why” and not “where”, and in the wherefore art thou scene, Juliet is actually asking him why is his name Romeo, meaning a Montague. And not trying to find him. Revelation. (a few days later) I have now finished Romeo and Juliet . Indeed, as what the tumblrs say, Romeo and Juliet were teenagers who loved and that is that. Juliet was 13, a ripe age to wed and reproduce in the story, given that her Lady Capulet’s age is given to be 26 which is just twice of Juliet’s. to think my own Mom only got married at 26. And perhaps there’s the cultural evolution thing going on in pre-industrial Italy (likely to be after or in the late part of the Renaissance), whereby people gradually have their children at later and later ages. And it is very possibly normal at that time for girls to marry at like, 13, immediately after getting their ...

29 Apr 2019 I am aware that my comparison will be devoid of historical truth given that it is all based upon fictional works.  Also, this is some 8-century difference of an AU. And it is based upon only one reference that makes them similar, and pathetic. My tendency to make middle aged men nearing death my muse is making me tired. The following points of similarities that I have observed between Lin-Manuel Miranda’s Hamilton and Shakespeare’s Macbeth after having watched an animatic edit of the former and read an annotated libretto of the latter. They die at almost the same age, Macbeth at the age of 52, and Hamilton at the disputed age of either 47 or 49. They were in positions of political power. I mean, duh, if not we wouldn’t even have heard of them. Macbeth was a king and Hamilton a Secretary of Treasury. While they were in the height of their leadership, they were hated by those around them. Hamilton was hated for having Washington’s support and being a loud-mouth, ...

25 Apr 2019 So, there’s this story I heard when I was in school. It was 2017 and “class Instagram pages” were all the rage. It was just a more sophisticated way to cyberbully, for all I care. And of course, the nerdier kids use those things to publish memes which usually flopped (if you’re me cos I’m sort of a normie) and its kind of just a piece of bs. There were some really incriminating unglams, including most people who even attended school, you get your picture paparazzi-ed unknowingly, and the photos taken are without permission and once the page is frozen there is no way of removing those photographs, for a person who has somehow lost the password to the page. Pathetic, I know. Blatant cyberbullying. I heard of this story regarding a friend’s classes’ Instagram page. It was sometime in early October, I suppose. One day there was a huge mountain of story posts made by some student and more people started creating more Instagram stories on the same class page, and it was a way ...

23 Apr 2019 This is a rant about how pissed I am and how dehydrated I am and how my neck and my head hurts. The day 12/04/19. I went to an interview, pretty important and a crazy good job so you'd expect that the process is quite crazy as well. The damn interview was an affair that took up my entire morning, and its effects lasted the entire day, and I think it will not end. The preparation plus the travelling and the rituals was the entire morning, or a quarter of my day since 6.30am, with the actual interview being a jaw-dropping half of that time. Can you fcking believe it? I don’t know if I should be proud of my accomplishment or what. I made a fcking I/O psychologist perceive me as a whiney and emotional “emo” overgrown teenager, already nineteen but “frightened like a child, lazy and numb”. I didn’t intend that at all, but after I typed that I realise that this Pierre Bezukhov quote fits me so, so well. And who gets upset easily when things don’t go my way and becomes with...

05 Apr 2019 There is this toxic millennial mentality of the “hustle culture” that has spread to even Gen Xers. This toxic culture which is what our Lord and God Jesus had in mind when he made it a sin to work on Saturdays. We live in a society. This toxic society that forbids anyone from resting. That every moment of your time should be filled with activities be it working or vacationing. Richard Dawkins said: We are going to die, and that makes us the lucky ones. Most people are never going to die because they are never going to be born. The potential people who could have been here in my place but who will in fact never see the light of day outnumber the sand grains of Arabia. Certainly, those unborn ghosts include greater poets than Keats, scientists greater than Newton. We know this because the set of possible people allowed by our DNA so massively exceeds the set of actual people. In the teeth of these stupefying odds it is you and I, in our ordinariness, that are here. We pr...

31 Mar 2019 I don’t know if I have already mentioned the agency name or the company name in previous posts, but for legality issues I shall write this like I have never mentioned it before. I worked at a non-financial company that is in listed in the STI ETF. That’s all I am at liberty to say. So, my actual work contract turned out to be ten weeks long rather than thirteen weeks, or three months. Because the agency’s arrangement with the company I worked at had some hiccups and they had to cut short the contract. And also, the agency was taking a huge cut out of my wages and I realised that there was a disconnect between what the company was paying and thus the quality of work they expect to receive, and the pay I was getting and thus the effort I am willing to put in. And this made me feel quite uncomfortable working there. Because I was wasting a lot of time in the toilet playing on my phone because of my laziness. And in the end, me and the person I worked with didn’t even finish...